tired..

part of me DARE not say it..

but I feel tired…

for months..

MONTHS people

I have had insomnia

the ONLY time

and it is 

RARE

that I get to sleep

is AT Blessings Farm..

and that is IF Little Man lets me

and THAT is a BIG if..

AND 

IF my rhythm lets me.

I don't SLEEP well 

I am always so so tired..

I pray for energy ALL the time..

Insomnia and hashimotos 

don't SEEM like they should go together do they..?

but there you have it..

I am tired

and I JUST can't sleep.

.or STAY asleep

till that last two

before 

my beloved gets up

and

 then I may as well be in a freaking COMA

I used to BE this other person…

go 

Go 

GO

I 

HOPE

in the LORD

TRUST

in the LORD

and 

WAIT 

on the LORD

PRAY

to the Lord

many of you NEVER even met me..

some have 

but have NEVER met the me

before lyme

and hashimotos

and brain tumor

and and and…

so you don't know

the ME inside of this body

trapped

and I am seriously

doing everything on MY part to be 

FREE

free from these illnesses

free from the captivity of this health situation

FREE 

to live and LOVE this 

AMAZING LIFE!

so even though I am resting on the couch…

eating all this amazing food friends keep bringing me

(psssst.. don't stop YOU all rock!)

I am feeling SO encouraged

BY your faith

mixed in with mine

BY your prayers

being injected into MINE

by your LOVE

infused into THIS

this trauma

this trial

this 

THING

thank you

for your prayers

your encouraging words

your friendship

your hope 

when I feel sad

or blue

or want to cry

THANK YOU

for being YOU!

for showing 

ANY ounce of humanity

for every ounce of 

love

joy 

peace

patience

kindness

faithfulness

selfcontrol

(yes… for when I am being a brat)

for more than you 

even know