Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Relax… you are not alone

RELAX

Doctors are funny people..
They have this secret… amazing sense of humor..
you have to be PRETTY sneaky,
pretty snarky to catch it..
which gives you all,
GREAT insight into 
MY sense of humor..
but..
catch it,
you can..
They say things like…
"find ways to de stress"
to mothers of many children..
or
"you need to find a way to relax"
to mothers of children with special needs
or
"how can you incorporate calm,  in your life"
to mothers with children who struggle with mental health battles..
all the while
the mother could just
crumble..
or burst into laughter..
I often 
burst into laughter
or crack a joke back at them..
like..
"gee, when I figure out the answer to that,
I will be able to pay off YOUR student loans as well as ALL my kids"
insert belly laugh…

SERIOUSLY
insert…
calm…?
peace?
I pray to JESUS for those things…
those are the amazing gifts He writes to me about..

and calm…
well…
that is I believe part of my progressive sanctification..
Jesus CALMED the storm
and I know He can CALM my life
but lets be frank..
not Frank.. the fun guy down the block,
but frank
as in be REAL
to the point
honest…
sometimes…
life IS stormy
hard to manage,
out of sorts…
What things can we do to restore SOME peace back into our lives?

Here are things that I have learned through YEARS of time in the Word
and walking through many challenges…



Psalm 90:12  So teach us to number our days that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom

The two basic things I glean from this is to to find time for the Lord, to be intentional about applying my heart unto the wisdom of His word.  
His word brings to me such peace, and such relationship with Him, so it is essential that I apply my heart first and always to prayer and reading of the Holy Bible.  
The second thing I glean from this passage, is the numbering of my days… 
 that my days on this earth and my applying my heart to seeking after His wisdom towards and knowing His heart should is something I want to be very intentional about. That my days NOT be full of chaos, but have some as semblance of order.. 
So.. having a good day planner, so my silly mind doesn't get overwhelmed has helped ME.. 
I need to CARVE out time for the things that MATTER most.. 
I also need to SEE all those other super important things on that calendar.. 
or I will.. forget them.they will flit and float right out of my mind..
I have brain issues, so I also have a VERY big desk planner hanging from my wall… 
for the WHOLE family to see.. 
we have regular brief family meetings to make sure every calendar is up to date with dates and events.. I have SO much more peace knowing where I am supposed to be.. 
My dearest friend went so far as to hang up 2 of these calendars, one is always one month ahead, 
so she can see forward better.. Her family serves in ministry, and she NEEDS the peace that comes with just standing back and looking at the days and knowing where and when things are planned..
It may or may not all come about..
as unto the Lord.. and all THAT.. but REALLY,
these two things,
bring about peace!
being intentional
with our time
daily
and planning 
brings great peace..


The next thing I do…
well TRY every single DAY to do..
is remember to read this..
and then..
I take all my needs…
and I write them down..
all of them..
then.. because God is a God of Order..
and my mind is sooo sooo dis-organized
I rearrange it all..
I write my 
To-DO list
which is stuff around the house..
like.. laundry, clean the floors, wipe the cabinets, wash the sheets, clean the dishes, make dinner, put books away, do that science experiment with Buddy, organize the desk, sort pill box, call certain doctors for appointments etc…
Errand List
go to library, Trader Joes, Costco, best friends, pick up kid at school, post office, lab for blood work, doctor appointment for (fill in the blank), gas station, pharmacy
Grocery List
produce, meats, spices, toiletries, gluten free snacks, gluten free bread
Fix List
everything that NEEDS fixing… like the toilet, the kitchen, (yes the WHOLE kitchen is on that list), closet & door for Princess, and windows, and curtains for ALL the bedrooms, and… and … and.. 
wow.. that list is too long and embarrassing to actually post on the world wide web! ha!
Learn List
Things I need the kids to learn.. I NEED to teach them, or need them to learn from someone somewhere.. so IF I am not going to teach them, I need to find a tutor or teacher or class someplace for them to learn that particular skill… 

Having some lists.. not too many, but having them .. helps, because I really won't remember otherwise.. sticky notes help.. because I write it down, and let GOD know about it.. and now.. there it is.. He will provide for it, with time, talent or resources.. or .. he won't.. I pray, and write,and wait.. He's NEVER made me wait LONG on the food.. but I have waited over 2 years on the dishwasher.. so I just wash by hand.. pretty soon, it looks like I might get a WHOLE new kitchen out of this … YAY God!  Often waiting, means what you want is NOT good for you, other times, it means something better is coming your way.. I really hope, the later for this kitchen fiasco.. (**smiles**)

all this to say, writing these things down…
giving order to the chaos to my mind
giving written word back to the gracious loving God
who first wrote to ME
(like writing notes in school.. so so cool)
is very stress releasing.
Once its on that paper,
and I have had my chat with God as I write it,
It's NOT a stress.
I know, HE has it.

Other areas that I am working on….That I KNOW I need to work on…
Drinking warm herbal tea
drinking LESS caffeine 
(I am down to, 2 cups of coffee a day!)
less icy cold beverages
more stretching of my muscles,
so they don't' retain and HOLD their tense posture ALL the day long.
We cleared a space for our Pilates
but for now
I am just beginning my "miracle ball" exercises
and basic stretches…
as well as the 
aromatic medicine I am learning in school…

Trying to keep the home clear of "clutter" is a HUGE challenge,
but VERY helpful!
as my mind becomes highly strained at excessive chaotic areas…

Healing foods is also helpful
so planning meals out at the very minimum one day ahead seems to help with stress.

I have a long way to go.
Stress seems to be PART of the package I have right now..
I am definitely NOT trying to write a lecture.
CLEARLY I am IN the battle.
I suppose the exciting part is… 
I am still battling on, I have not lost, I have not surrendered to the chaos.
I have victories weekly…
I have HOPE in the Lord…
I know this is an issue many of us struggle with.
Being a caretaker for children with health issues,
children with special needs,
puts us at greater risk for health issues ourselves.
WHEN we have to face those health crisis,
we have to face them with a confidence that others can't imagine!
If you are facing such a challenge,
please know,
you are not alone,
you are loved,
and there ARE things,
even little things,
that you CAN do,
to make a little dent 
in the chaos of your life.
and bring pieces of peace,
scraps of order, 
shards of calm 
to some of the moments 
that make up your days…
taking the places 
where the chain
that is you
the parts of you that are broken
are then mended..
bright
and bold and beautiful…
I don't match AT all anymore..
I have these cool,
heavy chains… that I am.
but where they broke..
from sickness, 
sadness,
death,
grief,
pain,
suffering,
tumor,
blah, blah, blah,
fill in the blank,
They are getting MENDED,
In the coolest
shiniest 
happiest colors..

don't be afraid to bring in your broken places..
just saying…
Those are now..
the best parts of me
you..
are never alone




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